It's nicer to focus on good thoughts than negative ones, but it is still an attachment to concepts, ideas, mind constructs. Maybe the whole point of human existence is to find our way back home. Do the whole consciousness circle to find our way back home.
Deurali, the last town
me on a bridge 
This valley leading up to Machhepuchare Base Camp is one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen in the world.
Surrender - that is the feeling I got when walking from Deurali through the valley to Machhepuchre base cap - willing and complete surrender.
Annapurna at sunset
Annapurna at sunset
For as long as I can remember, there have been two sides to my personality - the stable, organized math teacher/father/husband, and the irrepressible, irresponsible traveler. The latter side is often repressed, but there is no place where it comes out more than in the mountains.
Today, with the mood I am in, I am reminded of an event that happened more than 30 years ago. On the way from visiting my sister in Fresno during my sophomore year at UC Santa Cruz, my old college friend Ted and I stopped at Yosemite. Seeing Yosemite valley again caused something strange to percolate inside of me. I had spent 10 weeks of my Freshman year backpacking in and around Yosemite. When I saw the valley again I had to stay. The new term was beginning but I didn't care. I gave Ted my car keys and we went searching for a sleeping bag and back pack to rent. Just then it started to snow, and me having no gear at all for the weather, was convinced by Ted to return when I was better prepared. There is a side to me that wishes to drop everything, even all reason, and leap into the unknown, carrying nothing with me. I feel it now.
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